****

On this day of holiday. Families are together. Cousins seeing each other after months of separation, and uncles drinking cheap beer together. And as much as I never understood a real need for my family back in the south, I't almost makes me a bit sad today, as I sit here in this quiet dorm room in Manhattan. Alone.

But past all that, I was contemplating my future. No, not necessarily what I'll be doing for the next four years of my college career and after, but rather.. how.

Alot of people are drawn to the hipster aesthetic. And I guess it holds a certain charm at times. The parties, the attitude(that your doing well). The clothes. And the sense that EVERYTHING was designed, and thought out. As if it was all a stage drama. Slightly beautiful in a way, but yet.. Not.

I sit here, and look over a blog done by an acquaintance. It reeks of hipster lifestyle. And I consider, even if I wanted to create(art), in that school of thought, would I be good enough to join. And do I care(no)? Just an interesting thought.

Is it possible to just do the work you love and be a part of a beautiful thing, without having to wear the right clothes or "design" how wrinkled your shirt should be, to make it look hip. I have more important things to consider in life to be honest. My purpose on this earth, I don't believe, was to be hip. I have no idea how I come off to people. I only have a remembrance of the time I've spent going over the few photos I have of myself, to make sure that what I show on the net isn't fully ugly. Fully detestable.

I guess I'm ok with not being a hipster. It's too much work.

Afternoon. Justin-3:30pm